| |
| |
|
WebsiteAlways |
|
Love Could Be An Errand Away
You have signed up on several large dating sites and posted a great profile. So far, you've had some nice responses, but these haven't led to a meeting yet. Someone told you about a singles group at your church and there is an organization in your city for singles who want to volunteer, and hopefully meet other like-minded people. You've lost count of all the parties, happy hours and clubs you've been to, hoping to meet compatible singles. Whew! It's a lot of effort just to be in the right place at the right time with the right people. Or is it? In towns and cities everywhere there are single people (like yourself) going about their daily lives. Schedules consist of long hours at work and/ or school, commuting, appointments, errands, leisure time pursuits/activities and everything else that is part of the fabric of one's existence. In the course of a day, the average person encounters many strangers on the street, elevator, store, metro, etc. Have you ever really thought about the possibility that Mr/Ms Right could be the person behind you in line or across the aisle on the metro? If not, now is a good time to raise your awareness and broaden your thinking on the subject of how and where you can meet compatible singles. Armed with some newly acquired skills, your next chance encounter could lead to a first date and more. The following are areas to start building the expertise that will help you to stand out and get the right kind of attention when an attractive stranger comes into your sights. * Always be prepared. You just never know, so you need to make that extra effort before you rush out of the house. Take a quick look in the mirror, comb your hair and change those (horrid) old sweats into a nice pair of jeans. How you feel about yourself will be projected onto those around you, and really - you do look like your mother in THOSE pants. * Raise your general awareness of what and who is around you. Don't walk with you head down, avoiding any eye contact. Try smiling at people you pass on the street and offer a nice greeting or remark to the folks who wait on you when you shop, do your banking, pick up your clothes at the cleaners, etc. Take special note of strangers who appear to be single and to have characteristics you seek and surreptitiously check to see if that cute guy/girl is looking your way. If so, smile and say hello if it feels appropriate to do so. * Watch your body language. Along with holding your head up, remember to keep those shoulders back and walk with a comfortable erectness. Have an "open" posture. Don't wrap your arms around yourself as you stand or huddle in a corner when waiting/standing in a line. The eyes say it all; so let yours say "friendly." Communicate to others that you are approachable and let them see that you are interested- if you are. What you don't say speaks volumes. * Learn to be a good flirt. Along with body language and communicating interest with your eyes, you will probably need to smile and have a few good lines available. Rule of thumb- only approach someone who is reciprocating your interest through his or her non-verbal language. Starting with a question is always a good move. Make it real, non-threatening and impersonal. For instance, you are in a sandwich shop grabbing lunch and you are standing in back of a very cute guy. "Excuse me, have you ever tried the Italian sub here?" "It looks really good, but I hate it when they add too much oil." Safe, easy to answer and very open-ended. This allows the other person to share their experience with the shop (or lack of) and to add any comments or ask a question of their own. If they do, respond back with something that offers them the chance to keep talking. * Become a great conversationalist. Yes, anyone can master this. It's about focusing on the other person, deeply listening and offering interesting, upbeat thoughts and topics. With a stranger, keep it simple. After the first exchange, ask them easy questions about themselves. Not too personal or probing. "So, if you come here a lot to eat, you must live/work nearby." "I've been here a few times, but don't think I've seen you before." Or offer something about yourself. "I'm a vegetarian and this is the best shop for meatless sandwiches that I have found." You get it - safe, pleasant ways to ask about them, share about you and keep the conversation going. "On nice days like this I often eat in the park down the street- want to join me?" * Use common sense and take precautions with any strangers. He's very cute, but so was Ted Bundy. Never give out your home number, address or any personal information to someone you have just met "on the street." Most people completely understand and agree with this kind of caution and would not be offended if you explained your need to only give a first name, work phone number or an email address. If this first meeting leads to an offer to get together again, accept by all means if it feels right. But plan to meet in a public place until you have more information about them. Once you have had a few meetings/dates, you can exchange home phone numbers and more personal information. * Close the deal. So, you two have been standing in line and talking while your sandwiches were being made. You are very interested and don't want to just say good-bye. What can you do? You can reiterate that you eat here a few times a week and tell them that you hope to see them on Wednesday at around noon. You can pick up on something they might have shared such as their participation on their workplace sponsored softball team. " My team will be playing on the mall on Sunday at 4, when do you guys play?" Perhaps we will play opposite each other and can talk after the game." Of course, there's always the suggestion of eating your sandwiches together at that park down the street... Joining singles clubs and groups, posting personal ads and/or doing volunteer work are all great ways to try to connect with compatible, available singles. However, they are not the only way. Many great loves started from chance meetings in the couple's everyday world. So, get out there, really mingle and open your mind to the possibility that when you go around the next corner you will come fact to face with Mr/Ms Right. Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist and relationship coach with over 20 years of experience. As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including: The Chicago Tribune and The Orlando Sentinel newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, and Star magazines. She has been featured on ABC News; Discovery Health Channel and AOL Online. As a weekly contributing commentator on the KTRS Radio Morning Show, (St. Louis, MO), Toni offers dating tips and relationship advice in response to listener feedback. Toni founded Consum-mate.com in 2002 to offer singles the knowledge and tools they need to find and sustain healthy, lasting love relationships. She is a member of The International Coach Federation,The International Association Of Coaches and The National Association Of Social Workers http://www.consum-mate.com Toni@consum-mate.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Dating - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Adult Dating: Friend or Foe - Your Sex Life and the Internet! There was a time when finding a date, partner, lover or playmate online was frowned upon. It was for people who couldn't get a date any other way! Oh how things have changed?not only can you sign up to a site listing thousands of singles who match your height, size, location and taste in food?now you can choose your sex partners too. What You Must Know About Dating a Non Christian Inevitably, when the topic of dating comes up among Christian teens, the question that always seems to come up is, "Can I date a non-Christian?"Most of the time, the typical verse that is used to answer their question is 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, which says, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?"Knowing that you aren't supposed to date non Christians is one thing, but actually understanding why the Lord doesn't want you to date and marry a non Christian is another matter, so let's look some of the reasons why you aren't supposed to date an unbeliever. Finding Your Dream Date Sometimes Takes Guts! My husband and I used to live in NYC. WE would often take dog for a walk last night to get her and us exercise. The Dating Game Why is it some people look at dating as a game while other look at it as serious "soul mate searching"? That all depends on what you searching for; a friend, a lover, or are you searching for a true lifetime commitment?The existence of this game makes sense. Most people do not want their choice of mate to be the first person who comes along. Who Says Online Datings Only For Losers? I let that friend talk me into browsing some pictures on one of the more popular dating sites. I had to say, there were some pretty decent looking men on there. Ten Great Holiday Dates For Singles Dating during the holiday season can be a special treat. Of course, in order to fully experience this you may need to re-order some priorities and make time for yourself and your own personal needs. Online Dating: How I Met My Mate Do you think online dating is only for the young and the foolish? Not true! Lots of men and and women of all ages are finding the love of their life through online dating. I did it and so can you. How to Get a Girl to Like You We've all had that special woman in our lives. You know. Fatal Flaws- How to Have a Happy Relationship and Keep Your Values Intact If you are knee deep in trying to find a relationship, maintain or sustain a relationship then you need to think seriously about your Fatal Flaws. Not your own mind you, but those that are demonstrated by that really cute guy/girl you are considering getting into "bed" with, literally and figuratively. Lonely Expats Looking for Valentines Love Being an expat in a foreign country where you don't speak the language is hard at the best of times. And if you're single with the most romantic day of the year looming, what do you do?You could sit at home and feel sorry for yourself, but the modern expat in Europe is turning to exciting new ways of finding Mr or Mrs Right before February 14. Do It And They Will Come: Pursuing New Adventures To Find Mr / Ms Right Are you tired of the whole dating scene? Have you spent many hours (years) going to parties and events with the hope of meeting compatible and available singles? If so, now may be time to think about doing something different. Really different. Online Dating Tips - Creating Personal Ads Creating a personal ad for online dating services is not difficult, but how well you write your personal ads will often be the difference between success and failure in online dating. All the rules that apply to advertising in business still apply, and those who define and attract their target audience will be the successful ones. When Should You Give Up on Chasing a Woman? This week I want to discuss chasing women, or rather I should say, when is the best time to give up on chasing a particular woman?When you keep chasing a woman that you're crazy about and it's all one-sided and she shows no interest in you, what should you do? Well, if a woman is not interested in you she will go out of her way to give you hints by the way she acts towards you. She will try to make it clear that she does not want to get involved with you. How to Flirt and Never Get Rejected! When it comes to flirting, you can get your point across very easily just using your eyes. Take a moment and watch people who are in love. Dating On-line in Safety Dating online can be great fun, stimulating and exciting. So let's first get it into perspective. How to Finally Approach the Women You Lust for We've all been there. You have been meeting her accidentally in the hall for a long time and every night you go to sleep you dream about her, you've decided a 100 times that you will stop being a wussy and that you will call her out on a date, but the moment you see her your feet are cemented to the floor and your tongue is heavy as it were made of lead. Web Cams: Windows on the World The webcam has brought a truly amazing variety of experience to the desktop user giving all of us true "window on the world" to webcams all over the planet. With a good webcam software to connect you to the vast array of webcams out there you can see live video as it occurs from such diverse places as???1. Hot Women And Eye Contact For a while now I've been wondering why some women always make eye contact and hold it longer than others, and in most cases, the women who fail to maintain eye contact are the best looking. Each woman is unique, so their reasons for not maintaining eye contact could be any of a variety of things. Gay, Single, & Loving It! Introduction We live in a society that places high value and expectation on being in a coupled relationship and singles are often stigmatized for their single-status. Gay men, in particular, are often labeled as being unable to develop and maintain long-lasting intimate relationships, adding yet another layer to this stigma. Online Dating Secret There is a simple online dating secret that can save you a lot of time and energy!This will prevent you from losing interest and focus on meeting women online.This will save you money and heartache?OK, OK, what is it you ask?Here it is for FREE, to you from Mick Jones, Author of 'How To Meet Women On The Internet'When I first started dating online I made a BIG mistake?I emailed contacts for MONTHS before meeting them.
|
| Interesting articles | Home | site map | Link |
| © 2006 |
